It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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