I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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