I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
is wine microwaveable?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize