we're chasing vodka with high fives
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
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He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
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Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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