i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You can't just leave with hair like that
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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