I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
