Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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