We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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