I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
