was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize