i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
