just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
