so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Randomize
