Tell her she can't have a vagina
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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