um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
