somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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