I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
