just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
