how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
