maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
