haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
