Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
