Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
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He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
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It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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