Umm I'm too high to move.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
