ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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