not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Houston, we have a squirter
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
