they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I wish you could order shots online.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
