Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
