Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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