There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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