I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
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His hands were made for my vagina.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
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His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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