3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
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