my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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