the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I stole a fireplace last night.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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