Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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