Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
