we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
The power of my boobs compel you
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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