i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
What a dumb baby whore.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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