i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
