I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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