just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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