Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Randomize