i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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