Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
