So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
