Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Vodka?
Forever.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
