everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?