Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
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At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
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I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.