Can Purell be used as lube?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
We have so much sex to catch up on
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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