I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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