Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
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