Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
